This or That?

You may or may not have heard of the game. You have a choice, this or that? Hamburgers or hotdogs? Coke or Pepsi? Survivor or Amazing Race? Cats or dogs?

Hmm....Cats or dogs...Well I have a problem...

This: A cat that has made my porch his home (I am making an assumption that he is a male for the obvious reasons). He sleeps on our comfy chairs, leaving his nasty cat hair all over them. I come home or open my front door to my home and notice that he is there....Enjoying himself on my porch. I have often smelt cat piss as I approach my porch. I know very little about cats other than they are laziness buggers. Never really liked them.

That: Our new neighbours have a dog (read: large mouse). This thing is small, probably cost them a bundle. This animal (I am sure that she is a female) does not bark. You know that high pitched shrill noise that an animal makes as if it were being hurt?...That yelping?...Well that's her bark. Constant, unrelenting, for no reason, shrieking. The first time I heard, I thought, oh the poor thing...Then I realized that's just her. I lost my empathy for that dog long time ago.

So on my cat infested porch, listening to shrill doggie noises, I made a choice. I Diane, have chosen this. I have chosen a cat above a dog. I choose cats. For those that know me, that is huge. For those that know my father, please don't tell him! I'll be excommunicated from the family.

So c'mon little yellow, white and black kittie....Diane's got a brand new toy for you...Its called a super soaker.